So I saw the best film ever. Donald in Mathmagic Land. Highly recommended. Anyways. Today was good and humorous, made me laugh, but tonight was disappointing as always. Probably cause there was a lack of Disney educational films in the vicinity. In other news, I think the word was “furnace master.” If it wasn’t… well now it is. (you know who you are.) Yay everything ever…
Today I was told I have trust issues. I laughed because hey, you’re an idiot! Multiple hearts follow.
My fingers are heavy and there’s a feeling in my throat. I love being content for no reason at all.
I feel hollow and sad.
Disappointment.. not coming from me.
And I don’t want to talk about it, either, because talking about it makes it worse. It creates new problems that completely eclipse the old and become my main stresses. It makes me feel pathetic for feeling the way I do. And I know what you’re going to say and I hate knowing you’re right. But now I’m left with a dilemma. I’ll hide it well.
Just turned on music. I feel better already.
I’ll start out with the truth: Things have been a sugar-coated pieces of okay lately. There have been a few disappointments, a few times where I wanted to sing “Bad Romance” and effing mean it. (That’s kind of up for interpretation.)
Now, everything is fine. And I’ll tell you why…
3 reasons for starters.
1: Cracklin’ Rosie.
2: Born to Be Wild
3: Hooked on a Feeling.
And to be honest, I feel happy. Blame it on the music. I really do believe that the happiest songs on Earth can change my mood around… perhaps even yours. Not that I’m preaching anything…
Anyways. Tomorrow is shaping out to be a day of epic proportions. I am still in disbelief about how my luck has turned! I just need to stay confident about things. And I’ve got to keep thinking happy things. And listening to excessive amounts of happy songs.
WOOOO tomorrow!!!!
I’ve been writing in my journal. I like this picture.
I must admit, I had given up too much hope. Now the light comes through my window in the beautiful morning, and I am begininning to recall my dream from last night just as I write this. I want to remember. I want to see certain things be set into motion that I have only daydreamed about in the past. I am silly, awkward and shivery. I shake when I don’t know the matter. I pace my floors in nervousness; but a sense of comfort and trust arises. I’m really very happy, you know.
Confined to my iPod once again. The least in your face picture I could find. :)
I should make this quick. It’s approaching 2 am, and I’ll have to get up in a little over four hours. I just hope I can fall asleep. I’ll probably be remembering forever, and then, when sleep comes, I won’t forget the feelings in my dreams.
It’s just… that I don’t feel lonely anymore.
My cheeks hurt from smiling. After a great but flawed day, it all comes to a mindblowing, happy conclusion. I would have never expected to find the missing pieces inside of me in this way, but it doesn’t matter. I’m giddy in a way where realism doesn’t matter. I’m living this dream life, where it can be terrible and come to the lowest of lows, but in the end (almost) everything works out and falls into it’s place. And Twiggy. I cannot wait to be Twiggy.
